What I am giving up for Lent

"The real miracle is not to walk either
on water or in thin air, but to walk on
the earth" - Thich Nhat Hah, Buddhist Monk

This year, for Lent, I am giving up being constrained by the belief that I don't have enough - enough money, time, or talent. I am fasting from I-am-not-ness, not young enough, not attractive enough, not good enough. I am giving up FEAR, that unhealthy fear that blocks me from the miracle of walking on the earth. Saying I can't followed by the words because-I-am-not is expressly prohibited.

I have been slowly reading and savoring David Adam's little book "A Desert in the Ocean: God's Call to Adventurous Living." Adam, Victor of Holy Island (Lindisfarne), writes extensively on the Celtic tradition and has published numerous collections of prayers and meditations.  This short volume (123 pgs) is a series of meditations based on a poem attributed to St Brendan the Navigator. It asks, no truly, it INVITES, the reader to consider whether God is calling us to live more adventurously.

In the early pages of the book a passage caught my imagination and I have been turning it over in my mind ever since.  Adam's introduction suggests connections between the early Celtic Church and the Desert Mothers and Fathers, especially in their world/church view.  He outlines several of the reasons the Desert Mothers and Fathers moved into the desert: to get away from a church growing in status, to seek a life defined by something other than wealth or power, and to seek God in all things.  They were not running away from anything, but rather toward something, toward a great adventure.

They may not have thought of changing the world, but they were determined to change themselves; they were determined to die FOR something rather than OF something, to show that life had depth, was adventurous and worth living.   -- David Adam, "A Desert in the Ocean", pg 4 (Emphasis mine)

I had to stop and take a deep breath when I read those words.  Apparently having fallen into a trap of viewing "adventure" as one of those things you do/have when you travel to exotic places, try extreme sports, wear trendy clothes or eat unusual food; I assumed it was only for those who had time, money, few commitments, and courage. Typically, I don't see myself as much of an adventurer, instead counting myself lucky to live in the digital age with friends who allow me to live vicariously through them.

Still pondering this notion as I stepped into my neighborhood coffee shop this morning, my husband and I sat down with two young women, recent acquaintances through mutual friends.  As the conversation flowed from women mystics, to fixing buttons, to neighborhood gardens I was struck at how these young women are living adventurous lives. Megan is an artist and musician who easily draws-in others with her creativity. Hanni's desire (call) to create and foster community is a thread that seems to run through all she does: planting a sustainable urban garden, publishing a 'zine, or experimenting with communal living.  They are running toward things that make life worth living, not only for themselves, but by extension for the rest of us.  I am grateful for them.

Suddenly, whack, I am hit over the head with the "Holy 2x4" as a friend calls it. God wants us to live an adventurous life, to LIVE and DIE for something, not just merely live and die! Adventure, me? This is not to say that my current life doesn't have depth or meaning, its just that I think there could be more.  There IS more, if only I will embrace it.  What if I went to sleep each night with the intention of being open to the work of the spirit in my dreams, knowing that the day, God's day, starts while I am asleep? How might my life be different if I woke up every morning with excitement and anticipation, thinking, What adventure will I have today, continuing God's work in the world, the work begun in my dreams? Is not this our real work, the work of the baptized, the work we followers of Jesus are called to do - to live and die FOR something?